Outfit for 6/28/14 - I Have Arms

Tunic - White House Black Market

Shorts - Eunina

Shoes - Saucony

Belt - Linea Pella

I put this outfit on yesterday morning while preparing to go to Costco.  I put on a number of various tops over the tunic trying to find something that looked good and covered my arms.  Alas, nothing worked and I was getting a bit despondent about the outfit.  I caught myself quickly and realized the real problem, I liked the outfit without anything else, I just didn't like my arms.

I would like to say that I didn't like my arms showing but again that would be wrong, the real truth is that while I like my arms while I am in guy mode, in girl mode I feel like my arms make me look like the Incredible Hulk.  Which is utterly irrational, I know, but it is an unshakable feeling.

While debating my dilemma I sought Jules' opinion.  She thought the outfit looked great and I didn't need to add anything else.  Which is when I hit her with the zinger about my giant man arms.  She gave me a roll of the eyes and told me to get the tape measure.  We then proceeded to measure each of arms at the bicep.  Our arms were straight down, the way most people would see them if we are out and about.  My bicep measured about 12.5 inches around.  Her was 14 inches around.

I then explained to her, jokingly, that people would come at me with pitchforks and torches if they saw my arms.  We laughed and I had to shut the heck up about having big arms.  Thanks wifey :)

At Costco that day by myself, Jules had a lunch date with a friend, I walked around like anything other time, except for that my arms were out.  And do you know what happened?  Absolutely nothing!!  Well I got my stuff, checked out, was asked several times "Ma'am would you like help loading that?"  (I was buying flooring.)  Which I declined.  I walked to my truck, and began loading my stuff.

It was about then that I realized another big mistake I had made that day.  Silly me, I need to start accepting peoples offer's of assistance.  I shook my head at my own ridiculous preconceived notions yet again.  Silly me!!

I need to learn that my brain comes up with thoughts/actions/beliefs for others that just aren't true.  Nobody is going to pitchfork me for having my arms out, in fact the vast majority of people, if they even look at me at all, will forget about ever seeing me oh about 5 minutes after I am gone.  When people offer help, they actually would like to help.

The truth is that when I think I know what someone else is thinking about me, it is really only what my brain can come up, thus it is me that thinks these things, not others.  I don't need to be afraid of others, I need to be suspicious of my own voices in my own head.

The older I get the more I am learning to listen to myself and I understand that my voices are often assholes.  I am on a mission to ferret out the assholes that hide within my thoughts.

Hmm.. too deep?  Sorry, this is supposed to be a fashion blog, I know right!!

Love you

Listen to yourself

And if you don't like what you hear

Change it

You can do it

I believe in you...

in me...

in all of us....

:)

Outfit for 6/22/14 - No Padding

Top - Chico's

Skirt - Love Culture

Shoes - Born O Concept

When I purchased this skirt I initially couldn't put it on, as my hips were too wide.  I don't wear large hips pads, but I always wear them.  In the dressing room it occurred to me that I could take them out, revolutionary!  I was then barely able to get the skirt up and get Jules to zip it.

I took a step back in the mirror and realized that I still had a bit of curve to me even without them and further more that this skirt helps to show it off.  Obviously, I bought it.  Surprisingly, being as it is so small, it is still quite comfy.  It is denim, but with a bit of stretch.

In the pictures I don't have any hip pads on, which is a total first for me, and I also have no inserts for breast.  It is an extremely well padded bra, but nothing actually in it besides me.  Which I do on occasion, especially if it is going to be hot; it was 100 degrees outside on this day.

An interesting thing for me is the sizing of the top.  I had never shopped in a Chico's before.  They size their clothes by number, like 1, 2, or 3.  I think the top I have on is a 3.  Which is a large.  It was interesting walking through the store and not having any idea what sizes to try on.  I just picked up whatever and went for it.

I wore this outfit when Jules and I went and saw Maleficent.  It was great.  We both really enjoyed it.  I also liked the after discussion between my wife and I and Google about the history behind some fairy tales.  Fascinating stuff actually.

Oh and on a side note, have you noticed how much I have been wearing these same shoes?  Lots!  They are comfy.

Love ya!

:)

Outfit for 6-14-14 - Belt or No Belt?

 

Tunic - White House Black Market

Tights - Taget

Belt - Target

Shoes - Born O Concept

Necklace - Target

I was thinking about this post today while I was working around my house and the thought I had was, 'what is a tunic with a belt?' The answer I came up with is 'a dress.'  And I think that is why I have the opinion that I do about the above outfit.  I don't like the belt.  Which is weird.  Normally I really like belts.  They can do so much for you, like say identifying your waist.  But with the tunic pictured above, I really think it does away completely with the look of a tunic.  So what is the point then of wearing the tunic at all?  Why not just wear a dress.

Maybe that is why both Jules and I voted for the tunic without the belt.  What is your vote?  Maybe I should figure out how to make a poll and put it on my blog.  Hmm... okay maybe not.

Oh and this is also the first time I have worn tights with a strappy shoe.  It was kind of odd for me, but I figured why not?

I actually wore this outfit while Jules and I traveled from Bend Oregon back down into California.  That evening we ended up in Redding.  But along the way we stopped and took pictures of each other in front of Mt. Shasta.  Beautiful place.

I really like that picture.  I think you can tell the shape of the tunic better.

Hope you all are doing great!

Love you!

:)

Outfit for 6-8-14 - A Dress as a Skirt

Skirt - Papaya

Tank - Mossimo

Sweater - Jones of New York

Shoes - Born O Concept

Necklace - Target

When I bought this skirt, I had no idea that it is actually a dress.  And yes, I tried it on.  But for some reason it completely blanked on me.  I got home from this particular shopping trip and was trying on my new items for Jules when I pulled out this item and noticed, oh crap, it is actually a dress!

I put it on and pulled it up to where it is supposed to go and I thought it looked okay.  Not great, just okay.  Tube dresses don't really do much for me.  I think they look amazing on girls with nice curves, but I have barely there curves, that need to be accentuated to actually be noticed.  I pushed the dress back down to skirt level and loved it!

It is super tight for a full length skirt, but it is also super stretchy, so I can actually walk in it.  I thought it would slow me down more and make it easier for Jules, with her healing leg, to keep up with me.  But apparently no, I still walked to fast; point being, I can walk in it.

I really like this outfit.  I think kind of because I am using the clothes for my own purposes.  Oh and yeah, my butt looks really good in this skirt.

Love you!

Ask Nadine - Beard Coverage

A reader wrote and asked:
"How long does your beard cover up last? Could you go into the beard part more? I have a sparse beard but it is dark in color so it shows up fast. Maybe I'm just not very good at covering it up yet. I also get a lot of bumps and irritation on my neck from shaving so close."

1 - How long does your beard cover up last?

My beard cover up lasts til about midday.  At that point I can see a few whiskers showing through here and there, mostly around my chin.

My wife says that maybe around early evening she can maybe sometimes see a few whiskers.  At first she said it lasted all day and then I pushed her for some sort of answer.

2 - Could you go into the beard part more?  I have a sparse beard but it is dark in color so it shows up fast.

I am lucky in that my beard is quickly going grey, and grey is easy to cover up.  And as well, my beard has a variety of colors in it with only a few of them being black.  But I am very lucky in that when I shave closely I have no beard shadow at all.

What do I use for my foundation?  Currently I am in love with my Urban Decay foundation.  It looks very natural and light.  Which I love.  Before that I used Clinique.  I liked that at the time.

For both products I went and had a makeover done.  Which is the only way I would really recommend getting a good covering foundation.  Just be honest with them and tell them what you want.  They want you to buy their products and all of them I have interacted with have been of the utmost in professionalism.  And yes I have gone in for foundation dressed as a girl and dressed as a boy and have never had a hint of weirdness from any of the sales associates.  Best way ever!!  I seriously recommend this, even if you have a tough beard shadow to cover up.  Many of the makeover artists look at working with a guy, or a tough to cover situation as a bit of a fun challenge!

http://www.dermablend.com/foundations-severe-flaws/new-cover-creme.htm

One thing I have heard of for good beard coverage is Dermablend.  I have never tried this product but I have heard it mentioned by many other cross dressers.  It is apparently excellent in covering up any sort of beard shadow.  When I checked out their website they also offer products for being able to cover tattoos.  So Dermablend sort of specializes in covering things up.

My concern with anytime I have tried hard to cover up my beard with a makeup product is that when you use any product thick enough to cover a beard, then it is going to look pretty caked on.  I am at a point in my life where I am developing wrinkles and thick covering makeup will initially cover those wrinkles, but as soon as I do something like say smile, Then my smile wrinkles look bigger than they normally are.  So these super covering foundations are great for pictures, but not so good for living life and wearing a product from dawn to after dusk.

3.  Red bumps and irritated skin.
I tend to personally irritation on my most sensitive skin, which happens to be my necks and my inner thighs.  Honestly I have not found good solutions for this.  I use some exfoliating scrubs that help.  Also good shaving techniques help, like something good to shave with, shaving with the hair, never more than once in 24 hours.  But my methods are not 100% perfect so if anyone reading this has good suggestions for this then please comment.

What to do then?????

My recommendations:
1 - get as close a shave as you can.  I shave my face in the shower, first going with the grain and then a second time against the grain, carefully!  Then I use an electric razor about a half an hour after I get out of the shower.  This combo makes my face smooth to the touch.  And if I am going to be out all day, I will never, ever shave my face twice in one day.  I can do what I do once a day, day after day.

2 - Get a good quality foundation from a quality cosmetics company, that you acquire by going and seeing the people who work at makeup counters.  Trust me they want to sell you their products regardless of if you are dressed as a boy, girl, or in between.  I would suggest having some decorum in your dressing if you want to be taken seriously and treated politely though.

3 - Don't worry if your coverage does not last all day.  If some show through, take a deep breath, and understand that it will be okay.  Have you ever looked at lots of different women's faces closely?  My wife did as a Clinique sales associate for a few years.  She has personal knowledge of how many women have whiskers.  So you are not alone!  It happens to all of us!

Okay, long post, but it is an important topic for many of us.  (I will say I have pondered electrolysis or lasering it off, but I kind of like my scruffy growth when I am not dressed as a girl.)

Arighty then.

Love you!

Love yourself.

Love your beard, though it is okay to hide it, just don't hate on yourself! If you do really hate it, get it removed, life is too short to go on hating yourself.

 :)


Photo at top of the page:  http://dialandis.deviantart.com/art/Beards-301306090